


My Head is On Fire

by Huge_actman



Category: The Greatest Showman (2017)
Genre: Everything goes up in flames, I love killing these two and putting them through hell, I've never done tags on here before send help, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Unrequited Love, barlyle - Freeform, bisexual circus dad's, the circus burns but this time it's not so happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2018-08-12
Packaged: 2019-06-26 11:06:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15661980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huge_actman/pseuds/Huge_actman
Summary: Hi guys! This is my first post on here. I've been working on several full works, but none of them are anywhere near completion. These are just some unconnected snippets and oneshots  I wrote to combat writers block.





	My Head is On Fire

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! This is my first post on here. I've been working on several full works, but none of them are anywhere near completion. These are just some unconnected snippets and oneshots I wrote to combat writers block.

Prompt: “You have to leave me!”

Anne!" Someone screams, and I look around and see that her face is not one of the sea of humans surrounding me. She must still be inside. Surrounded by the flaming walls of the building that is- or was- home to us all. Trapped, even. I picture her, long slender limbs, hair wild, eyes wide  
I bolt for the door, ignoring the heat that is being emitted from everything in front of me, and the voices screaming for me to stop behind.  
Inside the circus is hot as a whore house in Havana- hotter, even. Not that I had wanted to know.  
But Anne is in there, and I need to get her out. Kicking aside what is left of the flaming wood that composed the door, I dash in. I run for the ring, wondering if she might be trapped in some of her ropes.  
"Anne! Come on, everyone is out! Where are you?" I scream into the smoke and flame that is devouring the entirety of the building that has been home to so many misfits. The benches that surround the ring are all aflame, and I catch glimpses of faces in the blaze. I look back and they are gone.  
Smoke is filling my lungs quickly, and no matter which way I turn, I can't escape it, or the the ring. There is fire, fire everywhere. The bleachers are drenched in leaping, ghoulishly dancing flames, that jeer and mock. They lick up the walls, cover the ceiling, twine themselves down Anne's ropes, which miraculously still hang from the ceiling.  
And here I am, trapped in the center of Hades. In all this fire and terror and heat the one clear thought I have is to tell Phineas not to make the lions jump through the flaming hoops after this. Mere seconds have passed since I've ran into the ring, yet it feels like a lifetime. Everything is in slow motion. Time is nothing.  
I put my scarf over my nose and mouth, trying to filter the smoke as I look for a way out. It does absolutely nothing to help with my smoke intake, and I give up. There- across the ring, the fire is less, and I start to jog, still calling Anne's name.  
I think I've broken her heart, and now she'll die angry and hurt. I was trying to make her see, trying to help her understand what was so plain, but what she had been so avidly avoiding.  
"We can't rewrite the stars, they've been rewritten too many times before."  
Had I really said that to her? She was so kind and strong, and she thought she wanted me. But I had seen the looks she exchanged with the knife throwing girls, how they were always falling into each other, arms linked, clumsy kisses planted on cheeks.  
She didn't really want me. And I hadn't really wanted her. I had myself convinced, for a while, that hers was the body I dreamed of, making myself fantasize about her long legs when all I really wanted was to run my hands over the muscles of PT's chest. When I dreamed, it was not her mouth, but Phin's. 

We were both just freaks, trying to hide our freakishness in the shadow of one another. She wanted those girls, they wanted her, and I wanted Phin, and for so long, we had lied to ourselves, each other, the world.  
I stumble and fall to my knees and my vision blurs, though with tears or lack of oxygen, I do not know. My fingers dig into the sand beneath me and I try to force myself up. I have to find Anne..have to..  
I think the Earth has tipped over on it's side. Or perhaps gravity has stopped working. Everything changes shape and lurches, the ground becoming powdered with black pulsating spots. I feel myself being flattened, pushed into the floor. I fight back, struggling to regain control.  
A voice cuts through the haze, "Phillip! We have Anne, she's alright! Come on before it collapses!"  
Thank God, she's alright. I'll get a chance to fix it now  
He lunges toward me and starts to clear off the flaming shrapnel, ignoring the flames and shoveling broken boards off me with bare hands. “I’ll get you out Phil, I’ll get you out.” The walls and ceiling shudder around us, but he pays no attention to anything but the beam that is slowly crushing me.  
"You have to leave me, go back to the girls, they need you. Don't risk it." I force myself to say, even though I don't want him to leave me in the least. Phineas ignores me completely and works to remove to beam. He can barely lift it, and the flames encasing it make the process even more painful.  
"I’m not leaving you. Now, Phil. Crawl out!" He gasps, barely able to lift the beam. I pull my last bit of energy and grit my teeth against the pain, and haul myself out. The pain is overwhelming, and I’m afraid to look at the part of me that was beneath the flames.  
Large, calloused hands pull me up, but my body is not doing what I tell it, and my vocal cords are too clogged with smoke for me to speak.  
My eyes feel like they are filled with sand, and they are begging to close. I let them. As I slip from consciousness I feel Phineas scooping me up, carrying me wedding style out of the ring, jogging. My cheek thumps against his chest.  
What I have longed for is finally happening, at long last. I am in PT Barnum's strong arms. It's a good way to go out, I think.  
I force myself to move, and wrap my arms around Phin's neck. He looks down at me, slightly startled. I pull myself up and plant a kiss on his mouth. The last thing I hear is Phin chanting, "I've got you, Phil, I've got you. You'll be okay," and a terrible cracking sound.

 

The funeral takes place two days later. Phillip Carlyle slipped into a coma shortly after Phineas carried him to safety from the burning building. He died in the hospital late that night from fatal internal injuries, with Phineas beside him.


End file.
